recipe
Oct
26
2009

Lofty Goals

A very dear (and wise) friend of mine wrote these words this morning:

If I set my mind on it, my dream, my reality, my authenticity, I will become it. It worked in my young motherhood, why not now?

Those few words surely got the wheels inside my head turning this morning.  I think (and what do I know ;) ) it is because we found it more satisfying and worthwhile to do what we believed/what we knew to be right for our families than we do when we are just doing what we believe is right for us. So many obstacles stared us down and we quickly and easily adapted to whatever we had to. And there were so few choices. Real choices. It was always so easy to see what we shouldn’t do. We were in defense mode more often than not. Protecting, raising, nurturing.

Now that we have more time to pursue OUR dreams it’s so different. We are playing offense now! Able to aggressively pursue things, if we so choose. Sometimes there are too many choices!

Are we afraid of failure?  Am I afraid of failure? Possibly. Though most people that know me in real life, would argue that I really have few fears.  This is true but only because for the most part  my life mapped itself out.  There was so much that HAD to be done, that the few things I had time to choose to do were so inconsequential that it mattered little if they were successful or not. Oh I did little things like owning my own business but that was work…not my dream.  I am not even sure I have a dream ;)

Personally I find it very difficult to let myself realize how much my life has changed. How so few people actually depend on me these days. Many times I have said to myself (and out loud) “I just want to live to get my children grown”. Why would that be “enough”? I never really had any reason to believe I wouldn’t.  But at times it seemed like a lofty goal. Now I want to live until I am done! Done with what? I don’t know yet, but I feel like there is so much I still want/need to do!

I don’t *think* it is a matter of self-worth, but as much as I am trying to enjoy this season, if I act too quickly on my own behalf, I feel a sense of guilt. Then I have to tell myself it’s okay. That is what this season is for. While I am still young enough to start something new and actually finish it!

To find your purpose or purposes makes your life rich and multi-layered.  I don’t enjoy too many irons in the fire at once. Yet I am not content most of the time to just be.  There are days I feel like it but rarely two days in a row.  Now to figure out as my purposes wax and wane, what to do that is meaningful and worthwhile.  And to distinguish between work and purpose…that’s a whole other back of tricks.

Speaking of tricks…and treats…a couple of pictures from Hallowe’en Past.

halloween2

my little witches and their familiar

halloweencookiesHallowe’en cookies

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Laura

hmmmm… I understand. My kids are still pretty young (8 & 11) and at 46 I find myself saying: “Please God let me see them grow-up.” but I want more than that. I want to grow old with my husband & be a grandma but also I want to see things & do things but I’m just not sure what yet.

“Are we afraid of failure?”

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Have a great day ♥

Susan A very thought provoking blog. I suppose we should just do what we love, believe in ourselves, expect the best and do the very best we can in each moment.

I think success can be anything… and it is the journey to that feeling of success, not the destination that really matters.

Love,
Victoria in Houston