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Archive for 2012

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Oct
02
2012

Yummy and green!

greendrink

I will change the next one up a bit.  Really a bit too sweet for my taste.  Found the recipe here and did some changes in consideration of my food allergies.  I substituted the almond milk for coconut milk.  I think next time I will use just pineapple and not the juice.  And possibly hemp or rice milk so it is not quite so sweet.  AND happy to say my Ninja blender did a pretty good job on the kale. It didn’t completely puree the leaves but I am good with that. The minute I started drinking it all sorts of combinations ran through my head for savory versions as well.

Oct
01
2012

Welcome October!

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Sep
29
2012

Lessons learned.

561689_4607946087514_1328031851_nThis vegetarian (hopefully transitioning into vegan) thing is actually going pretty well.  It has been several weeks since I ingested meat.  I can honestly say I don’t miss it.  So far.  I have watched my men eat big, fat, juicy steaks.  I have cooked eggs and bacon for them.   I have made pot roast.  There was chicken/andouille gumbo…not one bite.  I am kinda proud of that.  But as I have re-learned as of late, pride does indeed come before a fall, so I am not getting too cocky. Just taking it one meal at a time, then one day at a time.

IMG_3003And really, if I were ever going to gorge myself this past week would have been it.  If  you think you are a small fish in a big pond or a big fish in a small pond never think your words don’t mean anything.  They do.  They can help or they can hurt.  It’s quite a shame to find out at such an advanced age as mine that I am still stupid when it come to such things.  There are for certain two ways words can hurt.  By repeating something said in confidence that should have never been said.  And by being the person that said it to begin with. You never know how things will then get repeated or how many times or how close to what you said is the end of the story. So at 53, I have learned several very valuable lessons over the past week.  Not the least being, if you don’t want your thoughts/words repeated, embellished, misconstrued  ~ then don’t say them to begin with.  I want to be that person that doesn’t say or repeat unkind things.  I know you have all heard the saying “Karma is a bitch.”   Well, only if you are first.  So Karma came back and bit me in the bum.  Nothing I didn’t deserve.  And now feelings are hurt.  And I can’t un-hurt them.  I can apologize, which I have done.  I can learn from my mistakes, which I have.

Why do people gossip and tell things they know are not true or true but hurtful?  To build themselves up.  To feel better about their own faults and shortcomings. To make themselves feel important and bold and truth bearers.  But frankly it makes the opposite true.  And anything said in confidence likely should have never been said to begin with.  So you can’t blame anyone but yourself if what you said was repeated, misquoted or completely changed and embellished upon.  Don’t say it to begin with. Don’t repeat things that are detrimental to someone.  What purpose could it have?  Only something bad.  Keep your mouth shut.  OR remember the old but true adage : If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything.  That will never be the wrong thing.  Because once the hurt has happened, asking for forgiveness is weak and may not be granted.  But that is about your only option.  Words can’t be taken back.  Hurts can’t be taken back.  And maybe before you repeat things you know will hurt someone if they hear it, it would be best to keep it to yourself.  What good purpose could there be for doing such a thing?  It honestly shouldn’t have taken me 53 years to put into practice since it is something I have known my whole life.

I am here to say publicly to anyone who sees this that from this moment on, I am done with the gossip.  I am done with the talking behind anyone’s back.  If it isn’t something I would say to you, you can be sure from today forward, I won’t say it at all.

I plan on taking some serious time to reflect on my  own life, shortcomings, faults and personality flaws.  That will likely take me the rest of my life if I live to be an very old woman.  I have a lot of soul searching to do. Hurts to try and mend. If I tend to my own life the way it deserves to be tended to, I won’t have time to get involved in conversations and things that will serve no good purpose.  And if I am not a party to those conversations, then I can’t be misquoted or held accountable for what I heard.

I have witnessed so many times what women will do to each other in the name of friendship. And most of us have things to be ashamed of in that department. Not the least of them being me.  I have been just as guilty as anyone in voicing my opinion as fact as if I were smarter or more knowledgeable than everyone else. To sound important or whatever the reason, it was wrong.  I have never lacked self esteem and it has been my downfall I am afraid.  This very week I have been humbled by how insignificant I am and what and who should be my priorities.  But my insignificance in no way lessens the impact of my alliances and words. And for that I am sickened and so very sorry.  Honestly and truly sorry.  That’s about all I can be.  I can’t take things back.  I can’t know what credit I have been give for things that I actually have not done.  But I am guilty of enough that that is really not important.  I can’t blame anyone but myself for my poor judgement and alliances.  I take full responsibility for my own actions and words.  I am one to throw caution to the wind in the past not being careful what I say or to whom I say it. Those days are gone forever.

Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it.  I am going to wake up everyday thinking about that and try to make it to the end of the day without making any that are irreversible.

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